Black & White.

Getting listless these days.
Work seems kind of unpredictable.
Sometimes I feel motivated,
While sometimes I just don't get the drive and energy to do anything.
Especially when I think of what's ahead.

I wish things were easier.
I wish things would simply float past on a cloud
And I can grab them as they past.
Ya ya.
That's wishful thinking exactly.

No doubt I am looking forward to the trip in May.
Yet I cannot seem to get past the thought that 10 days will be over in forty winks.
And when I come to the part of four empty months,
I can't help but hang my head in exasperation.

One year is almost up.
Fast but... mhhhh not so fast afterall.
I wonder if I have the energy to get through another year of this.
So what comes after next year
Another year?
But then again,
It's not that I have another choice anyway.

The more I think about moving,
The more dispair I get.
Answer-less questions keep swimming around in my head.
What should I do there?
What can I work as?
What happens to my responsibilities here?
What happens to the company?
Will I be happier?
Where does my money come from?
Will I fit in?
Can I adapt?
3 months seem easy enough.
But it's a total different story when it comes to staying for good.

Somehow I wish I were more talented.
Somehow I wish I had more money.

Shockwaves.

What do you do when someone tells you he loves you more than his life?
I cried.

With the best friend.
 
Met up with Xin for a short supper on Friday night.
I couldn't quite recall who told me that the cakes at Caramel were good.
But this piece of info lingered at the back of my mind for the past 2 weeks.
And I decided to go check this place out.
 
Caramel is located next to The Cathay.
It was a small shop but nevertheless, nice.
The one info that I truly remembered was that the strawberry shortcake there was really goood
And so i had to try it.
 
Xin ordered a marvelous looking marble-chocolate coated cake with marshmallow and peanut butter filling in between layers of sponge cake.
A tad too pretty to eat I would say.
It took alot of persuasion to dig our forks into the cake.
Each slice of cake cost us about 8 bucks but the portion was pretty worth the money.
 

Taking a short break after a long week feels incredibly good.

What Matters.

The past week was kind of hellish.
Failed tests, stressed over work, sad over goodbyes, little unhapiness and the list goes on.
The fact that Dani was here helped
But it has also made me realised that work affects the both of us to a large extent.

Then the thought came to me:
Is it wise for us to work together?
Will the problems at work destroy our relationship eventually?
Perhaps it's something that we have to learn to deal with.
Hard but definitely manageable.
That's where our temper and control comes into play.

We had little arguements along the way.
The fiery emotions fired up by the issues at work.
No doubt we worked it out in the end but it left me feeling dissatisfied at the end of the day.
I think I had this idealistic picture of our relationship.
I pictured ours to be a perfect one.
We didn't have any unhapiness until now.
So I was disappointed that the relationship was perfect no more.
And I was afraid that the little bits of unhappy memories would eat into the relationship bit by bit.

But we spoke about it yesterday.
And everything worked out fine.
Through this, I learnt that maintaining a level of openness and honesty in a relationship is important.
Communication should be the rule of thumb.
The reason why many relationships break down boils down to poor communication.
I guess i have been through that too.

I remember how i used to always keep quiet and say nothing when I am unhappy.
I stubbornly refuse to talk even when the ex-bf asked.
But now I make it a point to voice out and to share the unhapiness so that we can talk about it and work something out.
It is always so easy to simply say:" Nothing"
Yet a simple nothing often leads to more unhapiness.

Perhaps the good thing about Dani is that he believes in talking as much as I do.
And he makes the effort to work it out with me.
A trait that I greatly appreciate.

As we move along in life,
We learn to love, to let go, to understand, to embrace.
I have also learnt that when someone good comes along,
Hold on and don't let him/her slip by.

Friends around me are getting hitched.
It's always heartening to see your friends finding their soulmates and life partners.
I can't say for sure that I have found mine
But I feel that there's a possibility that he's mine.

Let's Go Hunting!

A backlogged entry.

Had my first taste of Easter this year.
Good Friday was spent indoors lazing around.
So we celebrated Easter Sunday instead.

I was greatly excited about the prospect of egg hunting amongst the grass in the garden
And painting the eggs thereafter.
So the bf prepared an Easter present for me.
He hid it out in the garden and sent me on my Easter hunt.

 

After all the hype,
It was time to make the Easter eggs.

   

I found out the trick to get a clean egg was to blow the contents out and rinse it with water.


It was hellishly fun to paint the eggs.

Had a spread of glitter glue, markers, fabric paints etc.
 

And this is what we both came up with after 2 hours.
I was damn proud of my final two creations.
The christmas egg as Dani calls it and the Easter egg with the hand drawn rabbit.



The first three eggs that we came up with.
Mine was Humpty Dumty while Dani's made no sense.
Was some form of abstract art.
 

The Choco-bunnies i got as presents in my Easter basket.


Immensely satisfied with my very first Easter Sunday.